Saturday, January 29, 2011

Memories of Joy from the Case Family

Joy developed a lovely relationship with Jan's daughters, Elizabeth and Emily Case, over the years. Here are just a few photos we took as the girls grew up.

This first one was taken in 1991, just a four months after Elizabeth was born.

Several years later, Emily came along.

Our daughters loved our trips to Bovina in the summers. They had a great time driving the golf cart around, and swimming in the pond.

Of course, other events happened in Bovina as well.

Joy would also visit the Case house frequently over the years, including when we lived in San Jose as well as the current house in Sunnyvale. This photo was taken at the San Jose house.

The Slote women were always a strong, smart and unforgettable group of women.

Finally, Walter and Joy were inseparable. One thing they frequently did when living in Bovina was watching daylight fade over the lake, sitting on the dock, sometimes conversing, often just quietly contemplating.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

The joys of Joy

Joy has left us, but the joys of Joy remain.  I will treasure over fifty years of joyful memories - from USC to Zurich, Munich, Salzburg and later with Walter on Central Park West, in Ridgefield and idyllic Bovina.  How honored I was that Joy came up to Toronto last October for my 80th birthday (1930 was a vintage year, eh?).  I will always treasure our little song and dance together.
Jim Norcop

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Truly a remarkable woman

I am so very sorry to hear of Joy's death, and send my sincerest condolences to you and your sister and your families. It was also quite a shock. We had only seen her here in the fall in Toronto and although she was a tired a little more often than previously, she looked so well and her spirits were so positive and upbeat as usual.  And then on Dec 15, just before Xmas I received an e mail from her telling me how enthusiastic she was about the upcoming family cruise to celebrate her 80th (I hope it took place) and about a new treatment that she was about to embark on. I guess one is never ready for such news about someone you care about, but it seemed much too sudden and too early for the end of such a vibrant life.

Your Mother and I met about 8 years ago in San Miguel de Allende shortly after the death of both our husbands, who coincidently had passed away within weeks of one another.  It was on a field trip sponsered by Mujeres en Cambio and Joy came and sat next to me and began talking.  We discovered that a) we had a great deal in common.  Both of us had had musical careers , (although mine as a  classical painist was not nearly as glamourous as Joy's opera and Holloywood gigs) which we had given up when our children were young and when handling the demands of a young family and a husband whose career was on the rise, and homes and cottages etc etc just became too overwhelming.  We also discovered that we both had extraordinary husbands, stars in their field with whom we had wonderful but not always easy marriages, and whom we both missed a lot.  And we both had homes in San Miguel, that we were unsure if we really wanted now that our husbands were gone.  

We also discovered that we liked each other a great deal.  I loved Joy's sense of humour, her beautiful laugh, her humbleness, and her shining intelligence and common sense which made discussions with her such fun. Of course she was beautiful outside as well - a completely lovely woman that I adored.  Visiting her in Bovina was  memorable and we had planned to do it again this spring.  In addition to everything else, she was the consumate hostess who had all our meals prepared and activities (opera in Coopertown etc ) organized as if she had a staff of dozens.  
I know you will all miss her enormously.  She spoke of you and Kim and your families and her wonderful daughter in law (great cook) and son in law often often and never failed to ask about the activities of my three daughters and their families whom she had met. She was truly a remarkable woman.  

I will be in San Miguel for 2 weeks on March 19th of this year, at which time I will make a donation to Mujeres en Cambio in Joy's memory.  If there is anything I can do for you while I am down there please just e mail me.  And if you ever find yourself in Toronto I would be so pleased to meet you and your family at any time.  I feel so very honoured to have known your Mother and only wish our friendship could have been longer.

Warmest regards ,  
In sympathy        
Joan Zarry

Friday, January 14, 2011

A Rock

Dear Adam, Kim and Family,
Doris asked me to send this email on her behalf:
Thank God for snow days!  Kathy and I had a chance to read Joy's blog.  Wonderful--and all so true and full of laughter as well as tears.
No one mentioned Joy's secret vice:  Historical romance novels.  (No matter how often she saw the movie "Wuthering Heights", she always yelled at Merle Oberon for choosing David Niven over Laurence Olivier.)
I remember what a charge she got out of toddler Allison mishearing her name and asking "Really, George?" when they kicked a soccer ball back and forth.
I am forever grateful for the rock she and Walter provided for Mark after Arthur died and I went to work.
Thanksgiving on Central Park West was glorious and Thanksgiving will always be "Joy's Day" in our family.
I give thanks that our marriages to two remarkable men gave me a chance to know and love her.
PS  Could you please tell me of a project close to her heart to which I could make a contribution?  My deepest love to you all.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Joy had it all!

Joy came in to our lives quite recently through her “old” friend Jim Norcop with whom she had studied voice in LA and Europe.  Nonetheless we met “accidentally” on a park bench in San Miguel when Rowley and I sat down randomly on the same bench with her and Fitnat in March of 2008.  For these past three years Joy has been a constant lovely presence in our lives – visiting in Bovina Centre or here in Toronto. Because she epitomized so many qualities that I treasure It seems like I’ve known her much longer –– openness, acceptance, strong opinions (!), love of fun and laughter, friendliness, sophistication, cultivation, worldliness, down-home charm.  Joy had it all!  It was a great privilege to have Joy in our lives if even for these three short years.  I mourn her loss to the world and send my condolences to her world of friends and admirers. 

Don Melady and Rowley Mossop

Monday, January 10, 2011

A very special person

Dear Adam and Kim,
I kept on thinking what to write to you during the past three days....
Distance did keep us apart but she was always in my heart and in my thoughts. She was a very special person in this world.
Our condolences to you and your families.
Fitnat Saran

Epitome of grace and kindness

Dear Adam,

Dave and I were so sorry to hear of the passing of beloved Joy.  She was the epitome of grace and kindness, and I will always be grateful for the privilege of knowing her. Please extend our sincerest condolences to Kim, Arnold, Jan, Fredda and all of your beautiful children. May God be with you in this time of sorrow.

With love,

Mary and David

Sunday, January 9, 2011


Proverbs 3
15: She is more precious than rubies, and all the things thou canst desire are not to be compared unto her.
16: Length of days is in her right hand, and in her left hand riches and honor.
17: Her ways are ways of pleasantness and all her paths are peace.
18: She is a tree of life to them that lay hold upon her, and happy is every one that retaineth her.

Proverbs 31
25: Strength and honor are her clothing, and she shall rejoice in time to come.
26: She openeth her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
27: She looketh well to the ways of her household and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28: Her children arise up, and call her blessed.
29: Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excelleth them all.

Bill Joseph 

Stop this nonsense!

My friend Joy.

How long is she gone now, I can't remember. I am living with her in my mind and continuously re-experiencing memories (like movies in hi speed) of my very dearest friend... thoughts of her drift through my days and too, my uneasy sleeps.  She has disappeared and now lives only in my mind.

I can hear her tell me to "stop this nonsense."

She was my nonsense monitor.

She was gorgeous and lovely beyond compare, and gracious, and smart and witty and talented and comforting. She was wise and compassionate, she was resourceful and patient. She was the lengthening factor for all my shortcomings. She was my courage booster, my reason to go on during the darkest days. She was my mood leveler and my check in with reality. She was above all, my most normal friend.

She was my confidant, my sister, my mother, my baby, my sounding board, and my inspiration. She was my spirit lifter, my guidepost during lost wanderings, my light in the darkness, my balance pole on the tight rope of life's journey.  She made me laugh... and made me think... and then she made me lunch. How she loved to cook. Can there be anyone ever to match the heavenly manna she set before us all? She made me understand that life can be cruel and that is just the way it is.

She made me listen to many an Opera; she shared her family, her home, her food, her friends, her time and some of her innermost secrets.

When I describe Joy to anyone outside the family circle, I tell them she's the only one I know who managed to raise two absolutely perfect children!

How we laughed the day Adam and Yoonjoung walked away, hand in hand, down the sloping lawn towards the lake in Bovina planning their wedding and life together, leaving behind, a trailing scent of the delicious elixir of their happiness. Our laughter and giggles were wordless and in fleeting glances filled with giggles as we shared the knowing of their trials to be hurdled in their journey ahead....  What great joy for her to see her number one son choose, at last, the one! Of Yoonjoung, Joy, she thought the world. She was the one she wanted her son to marry... though to this moment, I doubt she ever told that to anyone.

And Kim, her gorgeous daughter... she told me how pleased she was that Kim had matured so well and grown to be "quite a gal!" She never bragged, was quiet, and private and quite conservative but in silent dignity, so very proud of her children, and their spouses and the kids they bore.

In speaking of Jack she'd always begin with "That, Jack," and of Mia, as "My girl, Mia... she will surprise us all!" Kate was "Her singing, dancing, special angel" and Luka "Her fine young man, so handsome and smart!"

She truly looked forward to seeing her family and spending time with them. The love and devotion that both her children and spouses shared with her over these past two years especially was most incredible. I know how very happy it made her to be with them and I tried to leave space for them to all be together alone. It is sometimes difficult for an outside the family member to come and go without being in the way. I know how important that time together was for her and I am so happy that it was filled with many fond memories and much love.

Shortly before she went to the hospital she called and we spoke. "Oh" she said, "just what I did not want to do... to be a burden on my children... and here I am... in Adam's house... causing all this burden." And so... she was as Kim has said so well before me, so totally sympathetic to her surrounding beings... so respectfully considerate and accommodating, she danced off as quickly as might be possible given the circumstances, to her place in what for sure is gracious heaven.

Occasionally she'd speak of things from way back: from before the time that I had known her... when she romped Hawaii barefoot, of her childhood school days, of her Mom cooking, of her Father and his work... and when she moved to California, of her adventures touring Europe and singing... of when she left home and when she met Walter, when she had her babies, when she lost her sister. She must have for sure held a lot at bay as she rarely uttered a bad word about anyone... quite opposite, in the many ways, to my approach of, 'say it all - with a general lack of discretion.'  She was for the most part incredibly tolerant and lost it with me only once... over my indiscriminate use of a kitchen sponge... an event which pierced my heart and crushed me flat without the use of force or weapon.

She had a wonderful sense of humor, an easy laugh, and most notably, a remarkable ability to slide over the bumpy spots yet maintain her equilibrium. If we learn by example, I am "all the wiser," for having had her as a friend.

She loved her extended family and in each she looked for always and nurtured only, the good. She adored Bill and his sense of humor. He was great company... a pleasure to be with, how he'd made her laugh and always been available to help with pasting the house back together somewhere. Her wonderful nieces and nephews... unbelievable, standouts!... a most remarkable family bound together with special and enduring closeness. Jan and Fredda and their spouses and kids... she thought of as blessings in her life; she loved them dearly and spoke of them often with great love.

All of her family, she shared with me. How lucky am I!?  From this example, I have learned to nurture and maintain my own personal family ties... to try and keep my mouth shut and to put up with some of my rotten disgusting relatives.

I remember our outings, our trip to the Hamptons and the room we shared in a quite dilapidated guest house (the only thing available in the height of the season) in East Hampton. We nicknamed it: "Musty Manor." She sat on the beach with me (covered up, of course) and in great fortitude she read in silence without complaint... waiting with patience beyond all the strength I could ever have, for the glorious moment she would be 'outta that place'... without the feel or sight of sand anywhere! I live for and long for only, the seashore.. the sun and the sand, the waves and the water... and she... could not have cared less if she never stepped foot on a beach again!

Our winters in San Miguel were filled with laughter and day after day we wandered mindlessly. We trekked just about everywhere... and always sighed in delight upon returning in late afternoons, to the cool shaded courtyard of her house up there on the hill away from the maddening crowd. With peaceful abandon we'd have some tea and toast while watching the sunset from our safe haven next above, what I named the view: "rubble in the desert".... that made her laugh and laugh! During these winter stays in San Miguel we'd gather friends in for luncheons and do glorious dinner parties. We attended every mediocre event, show, recital, concert, play, craft fair, art exhibit and parade that took place in that town... and rested and read quietly on the lower level while the fountain water bubbled, when all else seemed frivolous. We rearranged furniture, we painted, we watched workmen come and go and waited and waited the endless wait, for help to show up. We made up new recipes and she prepared her famous Margaritas extrordinaire, to ensure that if dinner was not exactly top notch... her guests would be none the wiser!

We visited Charles and Soo and shared, like royalty, their gracious hospitality... their delicious over the top lobster dinner, their lovely home and their perfect nearby beach. We toured Shelter Island and Montauk, and traipsed downtown Naples and watched the sunset from the pier, we walked the woodlands of Canada, the trails in the Berkshires, we shared Martinis and lamb chops at Shun Lee - her most favorite! We floated in the lake at Bovina and rested on the decks and walked in the woods and sat always for meals, at the best table showcasing the view of the moment.

We baked breads and cakes and tackled innumerable projects usually involving yards and yards of something. I called her my perfect little Korean tailor! We played with make-up, we tried every hair product on the market. We took clothes in, we let them out. We hung up drapes and took them down. We went to movies, we dined and picnicked and gardened and fixed everything imaginable and explored and walked and talked and rested sharing silence.

And now, there is quiet. For me: not new... as I have learned to live in quiet and to know that there is an upside to silence. One can begin to hear more clearly, the origin or maybe better spoken of as the birthplace of ruminations... where... in silent communication at the innermost part of the soul all appears to be connected in harmony... the greatest music there is to be heard.

And now, Joy and I, we still talk. We speak in silence, we really do... and she is telling me quite simply to "Stop all this nonsense."

Joan Bennett

There to guide and protect

Kimita, my adorable Kimita….

I just read your mail. I have sadness all over me.

Immediately I went back to see the pictures of the trip together. Your Mom looked so fine, so elegant, so much dignity in her presence. I do not feel she had the face of some one who was saying good by to life.

My dear, it is too late to call you. I will do that tomorrow first thing. I wish so much I could really hug you… hug you long and strong and tell you with my hug that I feel your sadness, that I am next to you now and always, that you are my true sister.

I believe there is much more to come after death, that the body gets old and tired but the spirit gets wiser and better. This eternal soul goes on with all that it learned to the next adventure were many of us will meet again with new roles in the play of evolution. If this is truly so, I pray her journey takes her to a peaceful and beautiful place. And that were ever she will be, she can still guide and protect you and you family.

All my love to you, Arnold, the children, your brother and his family. All, all my feelings and strong hugs to help a bit in this terribly sad moments.

Yours always,

An incredible grace

Dear Kim and Adam,

I just wanted to let you know that I've been thinking about your mom ever since I got Kim's text yesterday.

She was such an important part of my family's life. Heck, my parents might have had to hire somebody to look after me, if I hadn't been at your house after school every afternoon.

I thought of your apartment as my second home, and your mom was a big part of that. She was a remarkable person: tremendously kind but never gooey about it, strict but not in an ugly way, incredibly generous and SO funny. I can still remember her laugh, though I think its been a few years since I last saw her. She always had an eye for the absurd, and was able to make us laugh along with her even though we were just kids at the time. I remember looking forward to making dumplings with her (and eating them, too), periodically destroying her linen closet with our games of hide and go seek (I can't remember her ever complaining) and literally destroying your parents bed (we jumped from a ladder onto it until it collapsed; boy, were they furious). Your mother had an incredible grace to her that's very rare. I feel lucky that she was such a big part of my childhood; she provided stability that I didn't get from my own less-than-stable family.

I passed on the news to both my parents; they're both very, very sad and upset. My mother considered Joy a dear friend. I didn't remember this but apparently Joy, my mother and a friend of my mothers (Nancy Vale) once headed to the Caribbean for what apparently was a really wonderful, fun, women-only getaway. I think my father will be emailing you directly.

Please pass on my condolences to everyone there. Joy will be missed.



A brief review of her career

Dear Adam and Kim,

Just read the touching note in my e-mail that you sent to your Mom's relatives and friends.  Since we did not have time to confer on the obituary that Kim is writing, I just want to help with the data that you may not have.  

Korea-born lyric soprano who was active in opera and concert in the l950s, 60s and 70s. She received a bachelors' and masters degree in music from the University of Southern California, where she studied voice with Lillian Backstrand Wilson. She trained for opera under Carl Ebert and Glynn Ross and was a scholarship student of the famous Lotte Lehmann specializing in German lieder. She toured Germany and Austria under the auspices of the US State Department. She sang in concerts and opera in Korea, Germany, Belgium, South America as well as the United States, including San Francisco, Los Angles, Hawaii,  Cincinnati, Houston, Seattle, and other cities.     

Her signature role was as Cio-Cio-San in Madama Butterfly which she sang in Italian, German and English more than a hundred times. The Rosenthal China Company in Germany immortalized her Butterfly in a porcelain china figurine in both white and color. One of her last appearances in concert was at Alice Tully Hall in New York and in opera as Cio-Cio-San with the Seattle Opera. In addition to opera and concert, she sang the lead in Rodgers and Hammerstein's "Flower Drum Song" and in two of John Wayne's movies - "The High and the Mighty" and "Blood Alley."

Uncle Charles

Enjoyed each moment

Dear Kim and Adam,

Emily and Elizabeth loved Joy so much.  They would have been here at the memorial if they could have, but it was wonderful to be able to bring their words to the group.

Emily Case.
Although I did not understand why I had five grandparents when I was younger, Joy never treated me any differently from her blood relatives. I always felt just as loved with her as I did with any of my genetic grandparents, and it was truly an honor to know such a fair, unconditionally loving woman.
Elizabeth Case.
When I was six and Grandma Joy was sixty-six, I thought it was the greatest thing in the whole wide world that she was exactly sixty years older than me. We giggled and laughed and she chased me around in the Bovina sunshine and the sixty years between us were irrelevant. When we tired, we would go inside to fill a bowl with cherries, carefully picking out the darkest and ripest. And we would take them back outside and sit in the chairs by the lake and bask as we ate each cherry one by one. She taught me, in those moments, how to fill every moment with joy. I have never met another person who was so aptly named.

Now, even though I am three thousand miles away and twenty instead of six, she still sits with me. In front of me is a courtyard instead of a lake and I am eating an apple instead of cherries, but I feel her just the same. She is reminding me to look up, take notice, and enjoy each moment. She is reminding me to live life with vigor and enthusiasm and intentness. I only hope that one day I'll be able to return the favor to my grandchildren, who will pass it on to their grandchildren, and we will all live and thrive as joyously as she did.

Warmest Regards,

She was unique

Dear Family,

As you all know, Joy was one of my oldest and most cherished friends, going back over a period of 51 years.  Our families were intertwined, Joy meeting Walter during our "Flower Drum Song" days and I meeting George ...with a little prodding from Walter and Joy....over 36 years ago.

She was one of the most caring people I've ever known...and level headed.  No hare-brained...or might I say-mouse-brained idea remained unscathed when subject to a withering silence or critical gaze forthcoming from that usually smiling face.  She, of course, loved to buy and sell property and once called me with the idea of buying a house in Turkey after we had visited there.  Now it was my turn..."TURKEY!  Why Turkey, for God's sake?"  "it's beautiful there", she said.

And she was beautiful in every way.  I am so pleased to have known and loved her and there is another hole in my life without her.  She was unique.

She loved you all very much and was proud of you.  And she was secure in the knowledge of your love and caring.

Many hugs to you all-


A dear friend

Dear Adam and Kim,
My attempt to write on the blog site was unsuccessful...perhaps for the best.   I can personally extend my sincere sympathies to you and your families in this format.  
Your Mom was a dear friend, and  I shall miss her greatly.    Our lunches consisted in part of chatting about our families, and when I would ask about you both, she would, with a sparkle in her eye, happily relate your accomplishments.  
I know she would not want me to feel so sad when I think of her, but that is easier said than done.   I was very blessed to be able to call her my friend, and am richer for having known her....she was that type of person!
My thoughts and prayers are with you both and your families at this difficult time.
My love to you all,
Susan LaFever

Lovely, lively, intelligent and gracious

Dear Adam, Kim, Fredda, Jan and all the others in your family,

My sister Susan passed on to me your message notifying her about Joy's death. My mother, Ruth, and I tried to find you all, when she wanted to send a book to Joy, but somehow, she had lost the address and phone number. We sent the book to the address where we thought you were, Kim, but it came back. I am so sorry that we didn't persist; it would have been a chance for my mother to talk with Joy again.

I haven't seen Joy for quite a few years now, but I loved her dearly (and your father, who was quite a guy, himself). I was fortunate to see her fairly often, here in New York, in the years when she still came here and visited with my mother, and even, with your father, totally by chance, more than fourteen years ago in the Catskills. We ran into each other at a market, and I was delighted to see them both.

Joy was so lovely, lively (sweet but with spice), intelligent and gracious, living up in all ways to her name. I enjoyed every minute I spent with her, and whenever she came to visit with my mother, and I was able to, I tried to spend a little time with her, too. She was such fun to know, and even after she became ill, she was the one who put on a good face, being cheerful and upbeat, despite her illness. In fact, she was the one doing the comforting (of my mother). It seems that was characteristic of her. I have a vivid picture of her in my mind, even after all these years.

I have to be grateful, too, for her having been such a great friend to my mother over decades. I know that my mother valued her, trusted and felt close to her in a way that she felt about very few people. What a blessing to us, as well, that she lived well beyond the prediction! I appreciate, too, your comment about the irony of her having had lung cancer, despite not smoking. A man I loved very much had the same thing. No two cases are the same, but it is a hard thing, regardless of the circumstances, and I am so sorry that Joy and you had to deal with it.

Of course, I can't say anything about Joy that you don't already know, so I just want to say that I hope that our families need not drop out of touch, that I am here for you, even though I don't know two of you at all and last saw Fredda and Jan when we were probably in our teens, or younger. I heard a lot about you, of course. Joy loved you so much and was so proud of you and spoke of you often to my mother. Then she told me. I felt as though I kind of knew you, too.

Susan will tell my mother the news, and we all shall be here to commiserate with her. I am fairly certain that you'll be hearing from her. You certainly shall, if one of us can galvanize her to act. But if you don't hear anything, or don't hear for quite a while, please don't take it as anything but an indication of my mother's failing memory and sense of time, of her inability, at times, to act as she would have done in earlier years, of the kind of sadness that can sometimes stop an action – even one you desire to complet – in its tracks. It certainly doesn't mean that she doesn't care, nor that she didn't love Joy with all her heart.

I am glad that Joy had a peaceful death among you, and that it was not too prolonged from the onset of her breathing troubles to the end. Still, merciful as the end may have been, I know that this is a great loss for you that nobody can diminish much. I am also more glad than you can imagine that Joy was among us all for so long. Everyone is unique, but she was truly memorable. She cannot be forgotten by anyone who knew her. I hope that may be some comfort in the days and years to come.

For Joy's sake, I send you the love that I wish I could have given to her more often,


Loved by everyone who knew her

Dear Kimmie:
Pauline phoned me today with the news about your mother, and I am writing to express my own grief and to convey my condolences to you and Adam.  Your mother and father were neighbors and friends of mine for many years, and your mother was fully as remarkable a person as your father was, in every respect.  I once attended a recital she performed at Lincoln Center and was stunned by her talent and awed by the fact that this consummate musical artist could also stand out so strikingly as a mother, as a loving wife and companion to your father, as a whiz at real estate, and finally as a friend.  She was loved by everyone who knew her, and her loss is a hard thing to contemplate.  My best love to you and Adam, and Roberta joins me in sending you our total sympathy. 

A Void

Dear Adam,  Thank you for your letter.  I can't say more than you have said, but do feel that it is all so beautifully expressed and feel so much in accord with it all.  I shall be amongst those who shall miss her very much; her absence will create a void in my life.  My synpathy to you and all her family who survive her.  Marguerite

A Joy

Joy was, indeed, a Joy. She was a loyal and loving friend to my mother, Ruth Dickler, who enjoyed visiting Joy at her country home, where Mom felt at peace with the world. I loved seeing Joy, as she so warmly showed her love for others. Her enthusiasm was contagious.
I feel sad that she has left us, and grateful to have known her.
Susan Dickler

An Extraordinary Woman

We are deeply saddened by Joy's passing away. 

She was without doubt one of the most warm, generous, and thoughtful persons we've ever met. We will never forget her kindness to us and the wonderful, fond memories she gave us. What an extraordinary woman she was.

Please accept our sincerest condolences. 

Heasun, Joongi and Junhee Kim

Toast to Joy

To hear that your mom has gone has affected me deeply and caused me to remember both your mom and your dad, as I feel that I have also lost my parents. Joy was a coach, a mentor, a respite from reality, and larger than life for me. I remember every lunch in both Ridgefield and Bovina as though they were yeserday and I will miss them greatly. I'm not sure if I made any major decision from the year I met her without hearing first what her thoughts were. I will carry her srtenght with me forever as her trust in me made me feel like a better person. With my deepest sincerity may you somehow find the celebration of her life to be greater than the mourning of her passing. I hope you truly can cherish how blessed you are to have had this remarkable woman as your mother. Please raise a toast to the rememberence of her smile for me. 
With love. 
Carl Bailey

Saludos from San Miguel

Dear Adam and family, allow me to extend my condolences to you. having known some time of joy's illness does not help to fight my tears for what was a kind a joy-filed soul, with immense warmth and humour. a human generosity seldom seen and a dignity which was amazing. joy has carved herself a deep spot in my heart, which no one will ever be able to erase. her gentle laughter is with me and will now be my nourishment of her warmest memories. how luck to have known her...may she be forever in peace. I embrace you in your pain, saludos from san miguel, jackie

Friday, January 7, 2011

Joy Kim Slote

Our mother, Joy Slote, passed away the morning of January 6, 2011. We have created this blog for everyone to share their memories of her with one other. Please feel free to leave your thoughts by posting a comment. Also please send us any photos you would like to share and we will upload them for you. 

We will be posting photos as they come in, so please come back now and then to see them. If for any reason you need to reach us, please send an email to 

Thank you, 

Kim, Adam, Jan and Fredda